Telemarketers and Junk Mail

This is the place for those strange things you do every day... the crazy things you learned from your grandmother, or from desperation, that you think the world should know about. For god sake, White Out was started by a desperate house wife and some flour!

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Re: Telemarketers and Junk Mail

Postby KyleMaoin on Tue Aug 19, 2008 1:32 pm

luckylucy wrote:
KyleMaoin wrote:
Also you can just say "Oh shit, my baby is drowning."

I obviously have one sick sence of hummor for finding that amusing. that's it i'm going to hell.... :lol: :lol: :lol:

Sometimes I use that as an excuse for basically any kind of "be right back" situation. Leaving MSN, going to the bathroom, etc.
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Re: Telemarketers and Junk Mail

Postby poorandweird on Tue Aug 19, 2008 5:36 pm

^^ ahh, that made me giggle!
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Re: Telemarketers and Junk Mail

Postby amyisacreep on Wed Aug 20, 2008 2:49 am

Haha I am paid to deliver junk mail once a week. I don't deliver to every single house I am meant to..for example, if they have already got loads of stuff in their mail box or have a NO JUNK MAIL THANKYOU sign etc.
I've had people complain when I don't deliver to them though! My mum says some people use catalogues like a shopping list. Sometimes I don't deliver to every house, you see..
I personally like flicking through junk mail. If you don't want it put a (cute metal plate) junk mail sign up (not the gross huge tacky stickers) and you won't get any :D

ANYWAY, telemarketers.. I've had someone call me up trying to sell me deals with telstra, and after I politely told him I wasn't interetsed he said "Uh..can I ask..WHY?" and I explained I was with Vodafone and he sounded pretty ~butthurt.
If someone calls I just say "Sorry, I'm not interested.".
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Re: Telemarketers and Junk Mail

Postby grrl72 on Mon Nov 10, 2008 7:04 pm

The HoofFoot wrote:I've got some other ways of teasing them into giving up and forgetting my number, like if they're trying to sell me a women's magazine, I'll ask why did they call a guy? Or if it is a "good deal" where I get to watch some special tv-channels for a minimum cost, I just tell them I don't have a tv. They always get SO confused and just hang up on me.

This reminds me of my dad. Someone from the newspaper company called asking if we wanted to get the newspaper and my dad told them he was illiterate.
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Re: Telemarketers and Junk Mail

Postby Mistrust on Wed Dec 03, 2008 6:25 pm

The junk mail idea is brilliant. The telemarketer one is lame. I used to be a telemarketer...and all you have to do is ask to be taken off the call list. They will do it, and will appreciate you being nice about it.
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Re: Telemarketers and Junk Mail

Postby bunny1818 on Sat Jan 17, 2009 12:26 am

AlohaFromHell wrote:aww you guys shouldn't be too hard on the poor telemarketers though. It's seriously the worst job you can ever imagine, and sitting all day in a small dark room listening to how much people "hate people like you" is quite depressing :( At my former job, people threathened to sue me for calling them :/

I know it is so annoying to be disturbed in the middle of dinner by some idiot wanting to ask you questions, or sell you stuff, but i always try to just say "no thankyou" in the nicest possible way...

+1, I did this for a week; it was Market Research- not selling anything, but because it takes a couple seconds to explain that I got a lot of abuse in those few seconds!

Also, because we weren't selling anything, we were allowed to use a random digit dialler to find numbers [the numbers were generated at complete random by a computer, we never even saw the numbers or had any idea who we were calling so's the results wouldn't be biased at all] so we would often call people who had got their number taken off whatever mystical lists, and they gave me merry hell about receiving the phone call.

So, I'll always do a survey if I have some free time. But I understand about sales calls being annoying.

In a slightly different topic, how about street pitchers? [the people with clipboards asking for your bank if you'd give it to somebody on the street!!!!] I did this myself as well, so here are some handy hints.

1. You don't have a bank account/ a valid bank account for that country [I like to expand on this with how I'm just visiting from somewhere glamorous!]
2. You're under 18...[even if you OBVIOUSLY aren't, most'll not be rude enough to point it out]
3. Look behind them with an expression of shock and horror....maybe point, maybe scream a little... then walk off whilst they look away.
4. [if its for charity] I already donate to you every month ... make up a ridiculous, but specific, amount ie £1232.27... then walk off whilst they are gobsmacked.
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Re: Telemarketers and Junk Mail

Postby HorrorDoll on Mon Jun 22, 2009 7:13 pm

Thanks Heidi The junk mail thing is great advice
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Re: Telemarketers and Junk Mail

Postby rockgirl5455 on Sun Feb 07, 2010 1:34 am

I'm bringing this thread back.

I got a scam caller telling me I won a trip on some cruise ship. So, I started letting her have my information, acted all interested. She had told me that it was a very nice boat, and I had to act now or else I'd miss the opportunity etc. She asked for my credit card number, so at that point, all bets were off. After 20 mintues or so, I turned around and asked her "What if I'm afraid of boats and water?" She wasn't impressed.

If you're also by the computer, call up YouTube and play The Hamster Dance. See how long it takes them to hang up. Or, put the phone by the TV.

Another thing you could try is start singing... Anything. See how long it takes the telemarketer to get sick of your rendition of Taylor Swift's "Our Song," or "My Heart Will Go On" by Celine Dion. Just start singing, even if you don't know all the words to the song. Especially if you're a bad singer. :twisted: :mrgreen: :lol:
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Re: Telemarketers and Junk Mail

Postby rowanalabaster on Mon Aug 02, 2010 6:28 pm

I use to do telemarketing. It sucked hairy goat balls but there were some memorable calls for sure. This one guy had the entire rapper's delight track on his answering machine. It was nice to take a legit break from calling people and just rocking out to it. I actually called him several times just for the hell of it.

Another call this guy did nothing but answer with types of fruit.

- "Hi how are you today?"
- "Apple"
- "umm... okay. I'm from Blah Blah calling to see if you would be interested in XYZ'"
- "Guava".
etc etc.

Totally love the junk mail idea... especially with the shredding of the flyers!
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Re: Telemarketers and Junk Mail

Postby rainaraven on Tue Aug 03, 2010 12:13 am

i did telemarketing once. i must say it was awkward when i interrupted a funeral (i kinda knew the one person and checked & yep it was legit). or the guy telling me he had no one (i sold picture packages for a traveling photography company). i think in the 4 weeks they needed it done i sold maybe 3. but the worst job ever? i might have to think about that, i think i can come up with at least one or 2 more that are worse than that.
i do like the junk mail. i think ill try the confetti bit while im at it.
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Re: Telemarketers and Junk Mail

Postby originalhipster on Thu Mar 10, 2011 3:35 pm

I keep all the envelopes they included. And I use them to send out other mail. Most of them have the picture window in, so I send mail to a buddy of mine in prison. and the prison accepts them.
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Re: Telemarketers and Junk Mail

Postby MissLondonDisaster on Tue Mar 29, 2011 7:15 pm

luckylucy wrote:
Tuba_Punk wrote:I like to answer th phone:"City mourge, you kill 'em, we grill 'em." or "Bob's Abortion Clinic, no fetus can beat us."

oh my god that is the funniest fucking thing I had ever heard in my life. I cannot stop laughing. I am just waiting for a telamarketer to call. im on the edge of my seat.

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Re: Telemarketers and Junk Mail

Postby JadedScorpion on Mon Jun 25, 2012 5:18 pm

This stuff is sooo awesome. Most definately trying the tips about junk mail. :lol:
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